Do you ever struggle to control your negative emotions when encountering conflict with a co-worker, friend or even your boss? Often
times, people lash out or engage in an unproductive round of sparring
which proves fruitless and may even destroy the relationship. Effectively
managing conflict requires emotional intelligence and the following
steps to maintain an open, versus oppressive, dialogue.
Commence breathing deeply. When
a conflict arises, whether it's a disagreement about opinions, values
or preferences, our bodies have both physiological and psychological
responses. Think about the last time someone said something that infuriated you. Most
likely, you could feel your blood pressure increase and your palms
became sweaty. This is because the two amygdalae you have on either side
of your brain perceived a threat and properly responded by releasing
adrenaline and cortisol into your system. To counteract
these physiological effects, begin taking smooth, rhythmic and deep
breaths which will stop the release of these stress hormones.
Hone in on your body language. As you breathe, bring awareness to your non-verbal communication. Relax
your shoulders and open your hands instead of, for example, folding
your arms or pressing on your temples since these actions communicate
defensiveness and aggravation.
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