Tip #525 - Lemons Into Lemonade

Lemons Into Lemonade

December 23, 2014

By Carla Sprague

It’s no secret that life can be challenging. Unexpected events, situations or challenges can arise that seem to put a stop to the ideas, plans or dreams you have, hence the infamous quote, “When life gives you lemons…” But outside forces don’t have to slow you down, let alone stop you. One thing we sometimes forget is that we are not alone in our struggles. We are not the only ones to experience loss, setbacks, failure, and so on. It’s easy to feel alone – to wrongly believe that no one gets us or understands what we are going through. That lie – that belief – is a mindset created to extinguish your passion, dreams and purpose.

I’ve got good news for you – when life gives you lemons, there is an opportunity to learn. The opportunity to learn is to receive insight and understanding on how others were able to rise up from the ashes and burn a brighter flame then ever before.

So what’s the big secret to get up from under that rut? One word: mindset.

After reading Miles Jennings’ article on Entrepreneur.com, we thought you might be able to relate to one (or all!) of the 5 thoughts that crush success. We are certainly not strangers to the challenges of a negative mindset, and it’s important to take a positive approach to these common mindset minefields. In fact, our trainings continue to show that Dale Carnegie was a strong leader on this exact topic when he said, “Happiness doesn’t depend on external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.”

It’s not necessarily our circumstances that must change, but rather our ability to make lemonade out of the lemons. Or, as Jennings so eloquently puts it, “Challenge this thinking by asking, ‘How can I do this better?’”

We want to hear from you – what is the one mindset you struggle with the most, or what tools and experiences have you used to overcome negative thoughts?

For more information, visit our website!

Tip #524 - Networking Etiquette

How many times have you entered a room where you didn’t know anyone and either stood in the corner waiting for someone to approach while you continually check your phone? Or, in your attempts to conquer your fear, you leap right into a conversation with a group of people, nervously chattering and rambling on (and on!) about what you do and how everyone in the group should work with you. Or, maybe you breeze through the room with confidence and interest in others, handing out and receiving business cards with no follow up to ever take place.

It’s no wonder networking has started to take on the artificial feel of fake and shallow. It’s because the majority of people have no idea how to network! They know they “should” network and maybe they even want to and enjoy it, but have no idea how.

As Kevin Daum points out, decades ago there used to be etiquette class for networking. Where is that go?! People simply don’t know how to genuinely connect with one anothers in a way that is professional, courteous and mutually beneficial (unless they have attended Dale Carnegie courses, of course). Daum’s article on etiquette rules is a great resource for getting better results at networking – and leaving a better impression.

All 12 of Daum’s rules are insightful – trust us, these are not the types of rules made to be broken – but we have two personal favorites: Look people in the eye and smile (#10); and, Ask if you don’t know (#11).

Looking someone in the eye can be a challenge, but it shows interest, as well as confidence and focus. Daum admits to struggling with this rule and yet notes, “I find it changes the entire emotional dynamic in a positive way.” Smiling is one of Dale Carnegie’s secrets to success, because it allows you to build rapport, earn trust and enhance relationships – three important aspects of strong business building. Networking is really about creating a connection with another person, think about it: would you approach and build a relationship with someone who never had a smile on their face? It makes someone approachable and even memorable. In a room full of people networking, those are valuable traits to exude.

We like rule #11 for the simple fact that we know you can avoid that awkwardness completely. But, before we go into that, we want to point out that if you do forget a name, we agree with Daum that it is better to ask than forget and appear to be insincere in your networking efforts. Forgetting a name can seem like you don’t care or that you view the other person and unimportant – two ways to guarantee someone having a negative reaction or response to your attempts at connecting. In fact, another Dale Carnegie principle is to “remember that a persona’s name is that that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” If you struggle with this, let us know – we have a course designed just for this concept on how to never forget a name.
Tell us – have you taken a Dale Carnegie course? If so, what are some of the tips and trainings you have learned that have made you a better networker?

Kevin Daum’s 12 Networking Etiquette Rules can be found here: http://www.businessinsider.com/networking-etiquette-rules-you-must-follow-2014-11

For more information, visit our website! 

Tip #523 Ways to Delegate More Effectively

 

Delegating tasks efficiently is the most effective way to get the most out of your team's performance. After all, as a leader within your organization, your team looks to you for direction. The decisions you make affect everyone's workload, process and daily tasks. The way you delegate tasks can also eliminate redundancy and frustration experienced by your team members.

Here are five ways to improve your delegation methods from your friends at Dale Carnegie Training:

1. Provide Work That Team Members Can Complete Individually - Everyone enjoys the feeling of completing a task. While assembly line philosophy is important for efficiency, every team member wants to accomplish something specific. To provide this sense of completion, emphasize how each team member is furnishing a component of the bigger picture.

2. Clearly Communicate Deadlines - Ensure that everyone understands individual tasks, the purpose of these tasks and specifically when they are due. By providing firm deadlines, you will help your team learn how to manage their own time individually and as a group. If the project is large, include a timeline and due dates for milestones.

3. Convey Your Expectations - It is imperative that everyone understands your goal or output. In fact, it is perfectly reasonable to tell someone what your expectations are so there isn't any confusion to what you want or need.

4. Provide Your Team With The Right Tools to Do Their Job Better - Few things are more frustrating than receiving a task while lacking the tools required to complete it in an efficient manner. Make sure that your team has the necessary tools to get the job done, including computer software, a contact list, pertinent information sources, and suggested resources.

5. Give Rewards - Rewards let teams and individuals know that they've done a job well. While money can motivate, so can creative rewards. Before you delegate tasks, consider how you will reward top performance.

Delegation allows each team member to take responsibility for a piece of a larger project or goal. This can help you develop a more effective team and identify team members with leadership skills and qualities. As a leader in your organization, you must effectively delegate tasks and tell everyone your expectations and goals.

For more information, visit our website!

Tip #522 - "Born Leader?" Think Again!

At Dale Carnegie, we believe that by working hard on personal and professional development, you can be taught how to be a good leader. Leadership is about how to connect, communicate and collaborate with the people around you. These are skills, and while they may come easier to one person over another, skills, by definition, are "the ability do something well." Practice makes perfect, and it seems Kate McKay over at Entrepreneur.com would agree.

In fact, her recent article, "5 Skills You Must Acquire Before You Can Lead," talks about the hard work it takes to lead and lead well. While all five skills she mentions are valuable, we thought highlighting two actionable skills would be a great way to jumpstart your leadership potential.

First, practice self-reflection. You might think leadership starts with learning about other people, but it actually starts by taking a look in the mirror. Learning from your own mistakes and failures is one of the fastest ways to become a good leader. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes, but if you can learn from them, you will be ahead of the game. In fact, a popular Dale Carnegie quote teaches us to "Develop success from failures." Experiences - both good and bad - are meant to be used as lessons and tools for future decisions.

The second is to find your "Why" - your clear vision of what you want. This is what will motivate, encourage and inspire you when you face challenging times. This is what allows you to push through the storms that lead to success. Your why has to be big enough - rewarding enough - to take the risks that are required to be a great leader. Again, while some people are natural risk takers, every single one of us has a passion and a purpose in this life - a "Why" to hone in on and motivate us.

In closing, to become a stronger leader, start with these two skills. Think back and reflect honestly on your past mistakes and failures. Acknowledge them, own up to them, and then learn from them. Then, move on to looking inside to what motivates and moves you. What do you want your life to look like and WHY do you want it to look that way? Focus on this "Why" in the good times and the bad, and let it encourage you to push through the hard times. 

When you are ready, visit Kate McKay's article to get the next three skills:

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/239365

For more information, visit our website! 

Tip #521 - R-E-S-P-E-C-T- Find Out What It Means...

We've all heard the Aretha Franklin song about Respect - and quite frankly, the respect she's looking for is something we all desire. Hence why the song lives on through the decades. Respect is an issue that can build up or tear down relationships, friendships, and even businesses. Often on the heels of respect is trust. So what happens when the unthinkable occurs - you hire someone who doesn't respect your leadership and management style?

Drew Hendricks of Inc. addresses this topic with candor and clarity with his article: "How to Manage an Employee Who Doesn't Respect You." It can seem complicated and convoluted to work with employees who don't respect you; and in fact, fear of that rubbing off on the other employees can be a very real concern. It certainly doesn't help positive employee engagement! But, as Hendricks reminds us: to be the leader is to continue to maintain a high level of integrity. While he gives quite a few helpful tips, we are going to highlight our favorite one right now, and you can visit the article below to learn the rest.

His first point is to maintain a positive attitude, and in the heat of the moment, we know that can be difficult. Hendricks notes, "Employees tend to feel more positive when they believe their opinions matter to the organization as a whole," so if there is discourse in a meeting or in front of other employees, maintain your positive attitude and pull them aside later and ask them to communicate about any concerns they have. 

Let an employee know you hear them in a positive manner. Because we recognize the challenge (and importance!) of maintaining your positive attitude as a leader, we would add a side comment about the positive impact of 5-10 minutes of positive, influential reading every day. Starting with something like Dale Carnegie's "How To Win Friends And Influence People" may be beneficial in order to keep that positive attitude when dealing with a situation where someone isn't respecting your leadership.

As you will see, this positive attitude is the basis and foundation for the remaining actions Hendricks advises taking when you have an employee who doesn't respect your leadership style.

To read the rest of his helpful ideas in the full article over at Inc.com, please visit:

http://www.inc.com/drew-hendricks/how-to-manage-an-employee-who-doesn-t-respect-you.html

For more information, visit our website! 

Tip # 520 - You're Only as Strong as Your Biggest Weakness

Being a leader is about exemplifying the values and activities that inspire and encourage others to action.  At Dale Carnegie, we are based on the truth of one man's belief in the power of self-improvement. One of the best ways to promote and encourage self-improvement is to face your biggest weaknesses. In the Inc. article written by Minda Zetlin found below, there are 5 questions to ask yourself in order to help support that process.

Zetlin starts the article by realizing that for most of us, our weaknesses are nothing more or less than traits we try to hide, overcompensate for, or cover up. However, she went through an internal process to really notice and acknowledge her own weaknesses and not just try to hide them. This can leave one vulnerable but ultimately stronger. The first step is recognition of any weaknesses; the second step is to work on strengthening them. The article starts with three questions that beg for internal assessment. They require you to take a step back and think outside of your usual mode of operation, to review the situation and think about alternative ideas, solutions or situations.

The fourth question, "Can you get help with your weaknesses?" mentions "Getting assistance from someone else is a perfectly legitimate and very effective way to overcome a weakness."  Zetlin makes a great point that when recognizing and working on personal weaknesses, sometimes it is difficult or even impossible to adjust, shift and strengthen independently. That's why at Dale Carnegie Training, we offer a variety of courses around personal development. Some may say you are only as strong as your biggest weakness, and we want to help support you to strengthen those weaknesses. Effectively learning to strengthen weaknesses and use them as strengths is an efficient way to add value as a leader.

The article closes with two more questions that really drive home understanding the core of your weaknesses and how to make different choices in the future. If you would like to read the whole article, please visit:

http://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/5-ways-smart-leaders-overcome-their-greatest-weaknesses.html

For more information, visit our website! 

Tip #519 - Working Less to Produce Better Results?

You've probably heard, "The key to success is not hard working but smart working." Many of us (if we're honest) find ourselves busy, but not necessarily more successful. Cammi Pham's article on Business Insider highlights several key qualities that are keeping you from success.

 Most notably, napping, saying "No", and asking for help!

 So what does this mean for you, our readers?                     

 The three main takeaways from Pham's article are the following:

 1.  Let people help you

 In the Dale Carnegie community, we talk a lot about how to treat people and engage them as leaders. But part of being a great leader is recognizing we can't (and shouldn't) do it all. We need to create a team of support. When we are able to focus on our strengths and rest assured trusting and knowing there are others doing what they do best, it allows your work or business soar. Community is not only helpful to your team, but provides better content and response to those around you.

 2. Stop being a perfectionist

 None of us are perfect. We are perfectly unique and that is cause to celebrate. Life is messy and that's ok! As Dale Carnegie says, "Always be yourself, no matter what." Embrace the journey and relax into your imperfections - it will actually help you become more successful.

 3. Take a break

 Stress can compound if we don't have a way to release it and allow our brains to rest. That is when creativity and solutions usually come - when we allow ourselves to take a step back, relax, reflect and breathe. While it might seem like you don't have the time to walk away, it's actually the opposite - you can't afford NOT to take a break. While it seems counterintuitive, it will allow you to focus and be more efficient when you are working, allowing you to work less and experience more success.

For more information, visit our website!